We’ve been at this pandemic thing for over four months now - can you believe it? For me it’s been a continuous cycle of swinging back and forth from okay to not okay, sometimes from one minute to the next. Today I’m checking in to see how YOU are doing. Are you chill and relaxed, or a hot ball of rage? Are things okay, or is life a dumpster fire?
I am mostly okay, but only in situations where I can control my own space. Shared spaces are a nightmare. You never know what others are doing when they are at home. Sometimes you can see they are not making good choices when they are in your presence. I really loathe the maskholes who seem to be spoiling for a fight with their "I dare you to say something" expressions on their all-too-visible faces. Covidiots.
Ah yes. The complete lack of trust of people I don't know, or don't know very well. My neighbors invite people over and leave the house all the time, therefore I assume they are not making good decisions when they're not home.
We can't control others, and it's the worst when you have to share a space with them for whatever reason. Get away as quickly as you are able! But sometimes that isn't easy.
Our 15 days and 4500 miles on the road early this month made it the most stressful road trip for us ever. We constantly masked up and rubbed down with alcohol. Other than our four days in Albuquerque, we saw precious few mask wearers even where stores required them. Campgrounds were the worst for ignoring masks, and I saw little effort to clean common areas.
I had some kind of coronavirus in late 2018. Sore throat, runny nose for 2 weeks, couple days of pink eye and a deep yet unproductive cough that lasted two full months. My doc said I could only let the virus run its course. It was the only time my wife said she worried about my health. And I was too sick to travel to CA to be with my mom in her last days, as she wanted.
I'm sorry you couldn't be there for your mom. What worries me the most about this virus is that the effects are somewhat random, and if you don't die from it you can end up with a lifetime of serious health issues. Or maybe you have it and never know? WTF virus.
You've completely confirmed our choice not to go camping with your description. Bathrooms in campgrounds can be pretty gross on the best of days.
Not enraged, but I often feel scared and hopeless. Trying to find a balance between staying informed about current events and not spiraling into a pit of depression.
That is not an easy balance to strike these days. I'm there with you, though depending on how informed I am at the moment I may slip into that hot ball of rage...
I find that focusing on making art for a few minutes every day helps. And I should really put my phone down more. Have you found anything that helps you feel better?
i feel like i oscillate between rage and despair, sometimes all in one day, sometimes day by day. it's hard to know what to do at the moment; i'm terrified i'm not prepared "enough" but also, what exactly am i preparing for? i have been trying to remind myself that there is only so much i can do, only so far into the future i can guess at, and to try to be here and now as much as possible. which isn't to say i haven't stocked up on art supplies and beans and rice, but i am not planning to lone wolf it after the revolution, you know? my son the other day was decrying our lack of guns and ammo and i was like, "listen, i get it. but i am never turning this house into a bunker that we defend with violence against our neighbors." i told him that i want to make a garden with the neighbors and share resources and come together, not splinter off into our own angry faction (if it comes to that).
i also think working 40 hours a week is bullshit during normal times, but right now, it's even more incomprehensible. i rush through every week just waiting for friday afternoon so i can hide in my house until monday morning. i'm really only getting through that by reminding myself that we'll all be shut down again and hopefully i'll get laid off. :) then my husband can't be mad at me for not working here, i can apply for unemployment and finally be free of these classist/racists/capitalist assholes!
I just wish I could retire, but obviously I'm not old enough yet. Instead, I keep plugging away at work. I would argue that on most days I am more productive here at home because there are less distractions than at when I'm at work with the non-family people I like to socialize with as well as collaborate with for work. I often forget to get up and walk around when I'm working here at home. I will say that at this moment I am quite happy with the work I am doing to support my coworkers - I have a behind the scenes role and I love helping them do their jobs. When I'm busy like this it helps keep my mind off horrible things.
I usually spend at least some portion of my day really fucking outraged at something in the news. Then I do art, and I feel a little better.
The mood is similar over here: one day I feel *fine* just fine, maybe even like I'm thriving, and the next day the carnival barker who is president is sending prison guards & border patrol to rough up protestors. I've not gone for my walkies since the weather has been too hot, so that helps with not witnessing bad behavior. Here in Seattle, most folks are doing right.
I lost my sense of diplomacy the other day when the neighbor's dog barked uninterrupted for 15 minutes, and yelled at him to shut up. I really don't like my neighbors right now, and don't like myself for feeling this way--but they continue socializing and not distancing. Maybe they've got a germ group, and it's fine. But if everyone were as strict as we are being, we wouldn't be in this place right now, and it steams me up.
I love that cute little dumpster fire! It somehow makes everything seem better.
You know we totally curse our neighbors for their flaunting of social distancing. I sometimes think the same thing, that they have their bubble. But they leave just a bit too often for it to be a bubble. The mom of the kids has her bubble with some local shop that sells smokes and soda I guess...
On the bright side! Yes, there is a bright side, a small one. I was walking through the park tonight and a bunch of people looked to be playing Pokemon or Harry Potter on their phones. EVERY ONE OF THEM WAS WEARING A MASK. Even the kid.
I saw a guy wearing a mask while by himself in the park! Of course, across the way were 10 guys playing basketball...
And then there were the two women walking together with no masks, because I guess if you're outdoors then it's social distancing?
There's another pair of women that walk by the house almost every day. On the first pass they're both wearing masks, and by the time they return one of them has always taken hers off.
Everyday is different. Most days, I'm okay. There are days where I'm gripped with anxiety, frustration, and sadness. I live alone so that presents me with challenges regarding meeting my social needs. I have this duality with my needs for social interaction. When I'm around people, I present as an extrovert. But, I'm really introverted. I love my alone time. But, I require social interaction. Since I've been on summer break, it's really been hard.
My anxiety is mostly about work. I've been working on a committee this summer that is building what teaching will look like in the fall. It's been grueling. One of my colleagues referred to it like building with warm Jello. We finally have the go ahead to do distance learning in the fall. Figuring out our version of "going back to school," the hybrid model, has been crazy. Once we figure something out, someone will ask a probing question that unravels everything, like what about Special Education (my job). There is no perfect model. It all sucks.
I try to keep my connection to media minimal as it becomes a rabbit hole of anxiousness. I want to be informed but it gets overwhelming quite fast.
Daily walks and runs help A LOT. Eating food daily made made from local resources has been healthy and fun. I'm the most fit I've been in my life. That helps me find balance quicker than ever. I'm hoping this will sustain when I go back to my teacher life in mid August.
I am mostly okay, but only in situations where I can control my own space. Shared spaces are a nightmare. You never know what others are doing when they are at home. Sometimes you can see they are not making good choices when they are in your presence. I really loathe the maskholes who seem to be spoiling for a fight with their "I dare you to say something" expressions on their all-too-visible faces. Covidiots.
Ah yes. The complete lack of trust of people I don't know, or don't know very well. My neighbors invite people over and leave the house all the time, therefore I assume they are not making good decisions when they're not home.
We can't control others, and it's the worst when you have to share a space with them for whatever reason. Get away as quickly as you are able! But sometimes that isn't easy.
Our 15 days and 4500 miles on the road early this month made it the most stressful road trip for us ever. We constantly masked up and rubbed down with alcohol. Other than our four days in Albuquerque, we saw precious few mask wearers even where stores required them. Campgrounds were the worst for ignoring masks, and I saw little effort to clean common areas.
I had some kind of coronavirus in late 2018. Sore throat, runny nose for 2 weeks, couple days of pink eye and a deep yet unproductive cough that lasted two full months. My doc said I could only let the virus run its course. It was the only time my wife said she worried about my health. And I was too sick to travel to CA to be with my mom in her last days, as she wanted.
I'm sorry you couldn't be there for your mom. What worries me the most about this virus is that the effects are somewhat random, and if you don't die from it you can end up with a lifetime of serious health issues. Or maybe you have it and never know? WTF virus.
You've completely confirmed our choice not to go camping with your description. Bathrooms in campgrounds can be pretty gross on the best of days.
We even went to the extreme of bringing a portable toilet and bags that turn pee into a gel.
People are making such foolish choices. It doesn't help that some of them are relying on information from someone who is clearly round the twist.
Not enraged, but I often feel scared and hopeless. Trying to find a balance between staying informed about current events and not spiraling into a pit of depression.
That is not an easy balance to strike these days. I'm there with you, though depending on how informed I am at the moment I may slip into that hot ball of rage...
I find that focusing on making art for a few minutes every day helps. And I should really put my phone down more. Have you found anything that helps you feel better?
Going outside is what helps the most! Gardening, walking. I need to get out and spend some time with my tomato plants today.
The smell of tomato plants is one of the things I miss about not having a vegetable garden. Being outdoors is good!
i feel like i oscillate between rage and despair, sometimes all in one day, sometimes day by day. it's hard to know what to do at the moment; i'm terrified i'm not prepared "enough" but also, what exactly am i preparing for? i have been trying to remind myself that there is only so much i can do, only so far into the future i can guess at, and to try to be here and now as much as possible. which isn't to say i haven't stocked up on art supplies and beans and rice, but i am not planning to lone wolf it after the revolution, you know? my son the other day was decrying our lack of guns and ammo and i was like, "listen, i get it. but i am never turning this house into a bunker that we defend with violence against our neighbors." i told him that i want to make a garden with the neighbors and share resources and come together, not splinter off into our own angry faction (if it comes to that).
i also think working 40 hours a week is bullshit during normal times, but right now, it's even more incomprehensible. i rush through every week just waiting for friday afternoon so i can hide in my house until monday morning. i'm really only getting through that by reminding myself that we'll all be shut down again and hopefully i'll get laid off. :) then my husband can't be mad at me for not working here, i can apply for unemployment and finally be free of these classist/racists/capitalist assholes!
I just wish I could retire, but obviously I'm not old enough yet. Instead, I keep plugging away at work. I would argue that on most days I am more productive here at home because there are less distractions than at when I'm at work with the non-family people I like to socialize with as well as collaborate with for work. I often forget to get up and walk around when I'm working here at home. I will say that at this moment I am quite happy with the work I am doing to support my coworkers - I have a behind the scenes role and I love helping them do their jobs. When I'm busy like this it helps keep my mind off horrible things.
I usually spend at least some portion of my day really fucking outraged at something in the news. Then I do art, and I feel a little better.
First of all, 100 soft aka Truck Torrance is a friend of a friend. He made that little guy into a figurine and emblem for our times! https://www.entertainmentearth.com/product/dumpster-fire-vinyl-figure/dvsoft0079
The mood is similar over here: one day I feel *fine* just fine, maybe even like I'm thriving, and the next day the carnival barker who is president is sending prison guards & border patrol to rough up protestors. I've not gone for my walkies since the weather has been too hot, so that helps with not witnessing bad behavior. Here in Seattle, most folks are doing right.
I lost my sense of diplomacy the other day when the neighbor's dog barked uninterrupted for 15 minutes, and yelled at him to shut up. I really don't like my neighbors right now, and don't like myself for feeling this way--but they continue socializing and not distancing. Maybe they've got a germ group, and it's fine. But if everyone were as strict as we are being, we wouldn't be in this place right now, and it steams me up.
I love that cute little dumpster fire! It somehow makes everything seem better.
You know we totally curse our neighbors for their flaunting of social distancing. I sometimes think the same thing, that they have their bubble. But they leave just a bit too often for it to be a bubble. The mom of the kids has her bubble with some local shop that sells smokes and soda I guess...
On the bright side! Yes, there is a bright side, a small one. I was walking through the park tonight and a bunch of people looked to be playing Pokemon or Harry Potter on their phones. EVERY ONE OF THEM WAS WEARING A MASK. Even the kid.
I likewise alternate between OK and not OK. Better at home when I don’t see covidiot maskholes parading around like there’s no trouble at all.
I saw a guy wearing a mask while by himself in the park! Of course, across the way were 10 guys playing basketball...
And then there were the two women walking together with no masks, because I guess if you're outdoors then it's social distancing?
There's another pair of women that walk by the house almost every day. On the first pass they're both wearing masks, and by the time they return one of them has always taken hers off.
Sigh.
Everyday is different. Most days, I'm okay. There are days where I'm gripped with anxiety, frustration, and sadness. I live alone so that presents me with challenges regarding meeting my social needs. I have this duality with my needs for social interaction. When I'm around people, I present as an extrovert. But, I'm really introverted. I love my alone time. But, I require social interaction. Since I've been on summer break, it's really been hard.
My anxiety is mostly about work. I've been working on a committee this summer that is building what teaching will look like in the fall. It's been grueling. One of my colleagues referred to it like building with warm Jello. We finally have the go ahead to do distance learning in the fall. Figuring out our version of "going back to school," the hybrid model, has been crazy. Once we figure something out, someone will ask a probing question that unravels everything, like what about Special Education (my job). There is no perfect model. It all sucks.
I try to keep my connection to media minimal as it becomes a rabbit hole of anxiousness. I want to be informed but it gets overwhelming quite fast.
Daily walks and runs help A LOT. Eating food daily made made from local resources has been healthy and fun. I'm the most fit I've been in my life. That helps me find balance quicker than ever. I'm hoping this will sustain when I go back to my teacher life in mid August.