That's Gneiss! #124 ~ the Invisible Menace in My Mind
Also: a leaf pile leaping dog and muddled thoughts...
Oh HELLO.
It appears that we have entered the quarantine phase of existence now.
I have had close contact at work with somebody who is very likely to be infected with COVID-19. We can only assume, as she’s not in a vulnerable group and therefore was only “diagnosed” over the phone. The lack of testing is criminal.
The one thing all of us should do at this point is act as if we already have it, and do not want to transmit it to others. Change your behavior to save others.
Can we call it CORVID-19 instead?
Or, as Rowland our dog calls it, The Corroded Virus. He’s a clever pooch (not really).
Anyhow, here we are.
I would like to talk about something else today, but to be honest this is the ONLY thing that’s been on my mind for over two weeks. You’ve all seen the information about infection rates and flattening the curve. I’m going to talk about what it’s been like to live with this unwelcome visitor in my mind. You can run, but the unwelcome dweller had lodged itself completely and isn’t going anywhere.
Fortunately, having your eyes pecked out is not a symptom of The Corroded, so you can rest easy(ish).
It’s hard to believe that it was just over two weeks since I was in Nashville. The virus specter was already looming in the corners, and by the time I traveled home I was starting to feel pretty squidgy around large groups of people - like at conferences, or on airplanes.
The first week was incredibly stressful - paying attention to every single strange feeling in my body, thinking it was a symptom. Wanting to shout out an explanation of every little cough (swallowed wrong! just a tickle!) or sniff (allergies!). Hearing that fellow travelers from the conference were ill, but feeling better after a couple of days. Reading every article and watching the news from abroad as the situation became more serious, and the sudden number of deaths here in Washington state jumped.
Last weekend, we did a big shop and did some rational stocking up. I felt much better being at home and calmed down a bit, despite the increasingly grim news from Italy.
This past week was different, and equally as stressful as the first though of a very different flavor. It wasn’t so much about my personal physical state. Instead, it was all about the response here and across the country.
Despite the actions to close schools and then libraries, it all felt like dithering. I know it’s so hard to make difficult decisions and these are different than we ever could have imagined. Every minute of delay feels like wasted time and I feel a strong sense of foreboding.
Ahhhhh… Scarfolk Council. Satire that has become so real that the creator is not posting some of his old pieces because he doesn’t want to scare people.
We watched as Governor Inslee made his announcements, banning gatherings of 250 people (250 - so many!) and closing schools in our county and two others around Seattle. Two days later, he announced that all schools across the state would be closed for six weeks. Each day we waited to see what our library system would do - first cancelling some programs, then all programs and meeting room gatherings, then FINALLY closing the libraries to the public beginning at 6:00 pm on Friday. As much as librarians want to continue offering services to people, in the face of this public health emergency the only moral decision to make is closing.
Many people are not making good decisions around social distancing, and with schools closed the libraries would become crowded with children and defeat the purpose.
The waiting for updates was stressful and exhausting. Staff would still be expected to report to work as normal, and we figure things out.
Until.
Apparently, more than one staff person was feeling symptoms, and some had been instructed to quarantine at home by a doctor. Yesterday afternoon we were told that all library buildings will be closed to staff through the 28th. I was planning to stay home due to the illness my close coworker was reporting anyhow, but this came as a huge relief. I was worried about everyone in the libraries - just because the public was no longer there it didn’t mean the staff were in any less danger!
Nobody has a magical protective coating, and at this point we have to behave as if every one of us has been exposed and could be a carrier.
Michael and I did make one last shopping run on Friday, and the mood was much different than the previous week. The store was busy, and there were gaps on the shelves - it’s fascinating to see what people choose to stock up on. I noticed that a lot of the shelves looked okay, but there was only one or two rows of items that had been pulled to the front for the illusion of plenty. I’m sure that ended yesterday.
And of course, I have to share this picture of the toilet paper row.
Somebody will go home happy. Bamboo toilet paper - I bet that’s soft!
Life is very surreal. One of the strangest things to me, is the irony that we are just entering spring when the days are longer and it gets warmer, and people want to be outside. We’re still walking the dog, as long as we are allowed to leave our home. While it seems implausible, I believe we will eventually be told we must stay home. There are just too many people who are not heeding the firm advice to stop going out. Everything looks so normal, how could this possibly be?
The cherry trees are starting to bloom - spring is in the air!
We are pulling in, staying home. I/we will be:
Waiting to see if we get sick, hoping for the best.
Watching our elderly neighbors leave their homes for hours on end and worrying for their health.
Keeping a good sense of humor. Michael is making plans for turning the Durango into a Mad Max style vehicle.
Grateful my parents and Nolan are taking this seriously.
Looking for silver linings - time for art, reading, and gardening. And maybe unpacking a few boxes from our move a year ago (me, not Michael).
Probably losing our minds a little.
Eating good food that Michael has made for us.
Finally drinking some of that tea in the cupboard.
Wearing leggings that absolutely do not match my dresses. I will document!
And hoping that you all stay well and take care of yourselves and your loved ones.
Much love to all of you. Stay well. xoxo
Tidbits
A Mighty Blaze - helping authors and readers find each other during the time of corona cancellations. Virtual book tours and more. Note: this is a Facebook page.
If, for some reason, you want to read MORE about the coronavirus, here’s a list of articles, podcasts, etc.
Ordering takeout during quarantine… safe? Ethical? Necessary.
Five books I’ve tagged “quarantine” on Goodreads
Making: eyes at all of my craft supplies and books, no shortage of stuff to do while here at home the next two weeks.
Recently eaten: scrumptious Philly cheesesteak sandwiches last night, with garlic mushrooms. Yum.
Reading: I finally finished the 4th Murderbot book, Exit Strategy. Also finished Aesthetics: a Memoir by Ivan Brunetti, a comic artist whose work you would probably recognize. I’m now working on his Cartooning: Philosophy and Practice, and may actually draw something soon. I have so many books in the house I have no shortage of things to read next…
Videos of the Week
Time no longer has any meaning…
Also, a dog named Stella who loves to jump into piles of leaves! Watch to the end, you won’t be sorry.
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Question of the Week
If you feel like answering the question, hit reply to this email. Answers will be shared in next week’s newsletter - anonymously. Don’t be shy! General public commenting is available too.
Keeping it light this week… You have your own late night talk show, who do you invite as your first guest? What will you ask them?
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Last week I asked if you’re worried, and how you’re doing. I really appreciate your thoughtful answers, and know that in just one week much has changed and you may be feeling differently. I apologize for not responding to each of you right away. I believe it’s important for us to share our thoughts, and know that we’re not alone. We may not be able to see our friends and loved ones in person for a while, but we are all in this boat together as Humans.
I'm with you and don't like when people treat this as a nothing burger (I'm definitely going to start using this phrase). I was definitely one of those people at first wondering why Trader Joe's was so damn busy last Saturday and then the cashier explained the coronavirus fear. My german family calls it "hamster-shopping", all this pre-emptive and extreme stocking up. I thought everyone had lost their minds. But now I think we should definitely follow the advice of the authorities in our communities. But as far as being worried, I have to say I am not worried about catching it, but I am feeling worried about giving it to someone else and potentially being part of causing serious illness and fatalities indirectly. That being said I want the library to stay open as long as possible for people who may not have access to information otherwise. I feel it is my duty to do that as long as it is possible. I hope that all essential services continue to stay open. After all, there are many people in the community who will not have the option to stop working, will not have the funds to stock up, and will not be able to prevent exposure.
I just try to keep a normal two to three week supply of stuff like always, and like my Mama taught me, will try to cover my coughs appropriately, and will wash my hands while singing the ABC's. I cannot let myself really think about the what-ifs. It's too draining. Plus I love staying home so bonus if I get to stay home more now.
*****
Update: I'm so glad Washington is being proactive and closing the schools and libraries. I saw a tweet from a teacher in New York where they still haven't closed schools. She was riding an almost empty subway saying it might only be other teachers riding the train right now and begging New York to close the schools.
Also some good news - my husband works for Century Link field and they have announced they will still be paying employees during the closure.
Also air pollution is getting much better during this time in Italy. So yay for that.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/climate-environment/2020/03/13/italy-emissions-coronavirus/
Also after reading this article it became super obvious just how naive we all were all being at first and how pandemics need exactly that to happen.
https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2020/03/andrew-sullivan-reality-arrives-to-the-trump-era.html
I am a bit worried. I am trying to keep things in perspective, but it is daunting to go to work with all those open-mouthed coughers. My sister is coming for a visit and I worry about her flying. I have tickets to a couple of shows and I’m wondering whether to go or if that choice will ultimately be taken from me by the organizers. Yes, I’m a teeny bit worried. I like breathing.
I'm not exactly worried, because I know there's only so much I can do. I am pretty good about washing my hands already, since I worked in a hospital for a few years. I do have a tendency to get pneumonia and/or bronchitis when I get sick, though, so I'm not looking forward to not feeling great. :) The whole situation here in western washington seems extreme because we have a lot of people in this state sick, and so even if I wanted to hoard toilet paper and water, there isn't any to buy! One pro to all of this hullaballoo is that my family is talking more about emergency preparedness, whether it's an earthquake or plague, and we now have a spot with canned goods and a few jugs of water, just in case. I try to keep my long terms worries tamped down with thoughts of a soft-apocalypse style revolution, where we all grow our own veggies and create more community resources. The fact that the sun is out and I have seeds to start makes me feel hopeful!
I'm not worried. I'm an elementary school teacher. Of the science I've heard, most children have some version of a corona virus. I'm ramping up my hand cleaning and becoming more aware of how often I touch my face. I'm using my shirt and scarves to itch when it arises. I'm more concerned about how the public event and facility closures are affecting people emotionally and financially. This is going to have more of an impact on our economics right now. My sister is in San Francisco and says it's getting crazy down there. Fewer people on the mass transit. Supermarkets looking empty and bleak. She's going to high tail it out of there when the schools close. As for people getting sick, I'm concerned this could affect my parents. They are in good health but they are in their 70s. I'm trying to stay informed, wash my hands, and find calmness everyday.
I hope this finds everyone seeking the same.
It's complicated. 2 weeks ago a visiting friend stayed in Kirkland, then came to the city to hang out with me, and she whipped me into some worry briefly.
Given that the local scientific and governmental response is so robust, I feel better--but it doesn't inspire me that hospitals across the country can't get a straight answer because the CDC is rerouted through the Executive Branch, which...makes about as much sense as anything.
We're supposed to travel to Canada soon, but I'll understand if we can't go--even if it has been over a year since I last had a proper trip, I want to be part of the solution, not the problem. That's what seems hard to impress upon the population: you may not be at risk, but what about everyone else? I have friends who are immunocompromised, so my concern is for them. I've read too much about the 1918 influenza for my own good.I cannot tell if my sore throat is stress-related or due the cold weather, or something worse. For now I'm staying inside, but we're social animals, how long can that last?
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